With another big loss, this time on the road at Penn State, Michigan’s hopes of making the NCAA tournament are rapidly dwindling. I’ll save the actual bracket/schedule analysis for another day, but let’s talk about the embarrassment at the home of the Nittany Lions.

Coming into this game, Penn State appeared to be one of the few teams that Michigan actually matched up well with. No big inside presence, most of their scoring done by little guys. Of course, like the Indiana game, that meant the Nittany Lions shot the lights out, regardless of how open they were. Michigan, on the other hand, couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn (requisite Stu Douglass/Zack Novak “Hoosiers” joke here).

Originally, I thought that the great shooting for Michigan opponents in every game must have been a weird statistical anomaly. As the evidence mounts however, it’s become clear: this Wolverines squad just lets opponents make a lot of shots. I don’t really get it either, as if you watch the games, most of the shots that are going in aren’t great looks, and many of them are downright horrible. I think part of it is a confidence thing. Opponents know Michigan won’t score (the great shooting games by opponents are always matched by horrid shooting nights for Michigan), and they can throw up any shot without fear that missing it will result in points the other way. Combine that with slightly demoralized defense carrying over from the offensive side, and opponents can see defeat in Michigan’s eyes, and know they can score at will.

Speaking of Michigan’s shooting, it was god-awful this game. When DeShawn Sims doesn’t get things going inside, and neither Harris nor any one of the assortment of other guys can get to the basket, the offense basically consists of jacking up a bunch of threes. Of course, not all of these are bad looks, but this team has proven that they really can’t hit the threes unless other areas of the offense are moving as well. This team badly needs another scorer who doesnt rely solely on the three-point shot.

Manny Harris is getting very frustrated by not getting any calls, and I really can’t blame him. Did the refs have an offseason seminar where they determined that they had called too many fouls on guys guarding Manny last year? He couldn’t get a call if somebody punched him in the face. Compunding that issue is the fact that really soft fouls get called pretty much everywhere else (on both ends of the court), which Manny sees and gets more frustrated/demoralized.

And so, unless Michigan can right the ship very quickly, it’s NIT-bound very soon. Of course, based on last year, how bad is that, really? It seems like a good start to the year really caused expectations to be adjusted into the realm of “unrealistic.”

Posted under Basketball

On Confusing Insults
Saturday morning we left the house where we were staying decked out fully in our Michigan gear. Before we even hit the street from the back door, we ran into a few a Penn State fans. One of these partisans pointed at the group of us and yelled “FAG! FAG! FAGGOT!” I think we responded with either “Go blue!” or “Keep it classy State College.” Then the more we thought about, the more confused we became. Was there one of us who looked or acted some way to earn the extra syllable? Did one of us just seem more homosexual that that person deserved the full pejorative? By the end of the day we were arguing with each other about who was the full word. We decided it was Tim.

On Beaver Street some girls walked by looking really confused. As we got close to her she said “Who are all these yellow people?” We looked around quickly to make sure it was in fact referring to us. We were definitely the only people who could classify as “yellow.” I’m not sure if her use of the term “yellow people” is common in State College to refer to Michigan fans, but we were not used to that use of the term.

On Hilarious Things Saved for All Time

This photo was taken on Foster between Atherton and Barnard.

On Things That Might Be Related
One really awesome feature on Penn State’s campus is the Creamery. Both times I’ve made it down to State College I’ve stopped at there and gotten some of the best ice cream I’ve ever had. Unfortunately, there was no Peachy Paterno or Jay’s Java Chip or Chocolate Marshmallow Morelli. I got bittersweet mint and Nate got vanilla. It was delicious as this picture shows:

On The Surprising Calm
We were pretty sure that Michigan was going to lose, but we also knew we wanted to hang out in State College Saturday night. In the unlikely event of a Michigan win, I would have been worried about some sort of murder-suicide, mob mentality sort of thing. To prevent this, we bought Penn State hoodies (if Braylon can do it, we can). After the loss we decided to see how excited the fans were about a fairly huge game in recent Penn State history. We threw on our Penn State clothes and headed out on the town.

Walking down the street, one of us would yell “WE ARE!” and listen for a response. Generally even with big groups of people there wasn’t a huge response. Usually it was one or two people out of all of them. I’m not sure if it was a come down from the excitement and build up to the game, but many fans simply seemed deflated and relieved. I remember after the Wisconsin game this year or the Penn State game in 2005, Michigan fans were going crazy in Ann Arbor all night after the game. I’m not sure what was holding the Penn State fans down, but something certainly was.

Posted under Football

I couldn’t figure out a larger frame for these stories, so we are going to make them into a collection. There may be some things I forget, so bear with me. I’m still trying to recover.

On the Necessity of Shirts:
I will try not be too specific in order to protect the guilty. We stayed at a chapter of my fraternity at Penn State. It was started up there in 2001 and is now starting to become cemented on campus. Well, on that Friday night we got into State College around midnight with 30 rack purchased in Ohio. We were obviously too sober for the scene when we arrived. The level of inebriation was completely appropriate for the occasion, except for one gentleman.

This gentleman was one of the original founder of the chapter. He had to be at 25, but likely older. Tim, our mutual friend Nate and I were talking with a few of the brothers in the kitchen when this gentleman walked up the stairs from the basement we could immediately tell it was going to get interesting. He was wearing jeans and boxers and that was it. We all know the term OMG Shirtless, this was the opposite, so LOL Shirtless or maybe OMFG Shirtless. When both nipples and navel point to the ground, you should wear a shirt.

He seemed completely confused as to why Michigan fans would be in State College. He seemed fairly confused about everything else. After babbling on about getting special forces troops to kick our (meaning Michigan I believe) Marines’ asses, he set out trying to explain the new shirt sweeping Penn State this year. The conversation went something like this:

• Drunkard: On the front it says “Make Michigan our Bichigan.”
• Tim: uh… OK.
• Drunkard: Bichigan. You know, like bitch again.
• Paul: yes… bitch. OK.
• Drunkard: Bichigan. Do you get it? Like bitch again… get it?
• All Three of Us in Unison: Yes! We went to Michigan. We get it
• Drunkard turns around and walks away

He would later find his shirt and disappear into the night. I assume he made it to wherever he was heading. This was clearly not his first rodeo.

On the Dichotomy of Fans:
Before the game, we were walking around State College and campus decked out in our Michigan gear. We were going to see our friend play Penn State’s club tennis team, so we were walking down Curtin street by the Creamery (I think). As we were approaching the street, a car slowed down and the passenger leaned out the window and yelled “FUCK MICHIGAN! FUCK YOU GUYS.” A middle aged woman walking toward us turned around looking horrified and said “I can’t believe people would say things like that.” She did not acknowledge our existence.

We were walking down Beaver St. (I think) and on either side of there are tall apartment buildings with balconies. We saw a group of kids on an 8th floor balcony having a good amount of fun. Tim and I have been to State College before and are a little wary drunk Penn State students. Well, they started yelling at us when we crossed the street, and by the time we got near to the balcony on of the kids up there poured some vodka. This surprised me. I could understand throwing empty cans or something, but wasting perfectly bad alcohol on us? That’s just lame.

We were walking around trying to find a bar to watch the game. We went into the Saloon, and once we got inside of a bar, the fans were all friendly and good sports. One woman gave us a drink recommendation (a Bong Water Monkey Boy FWIW); I talked with another fan about how Rodriguez will work out in the long run (more logically than some conversations I’ve had with Michigan fans). Sure we were ribbed and there were some friendly barbs thrown, but it was in the spirit of college football.

I don’t mind people making fun of Michigan or me by proxy. That’s what makes college football great. Be creative and not threatening. Everyone is there to enjoy two programs going up against each other and two fan bases coming together. Have fun and enjoy it.

Photo: On Penn State Signs
The text of the sign:

ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION

Used for improved livestock breeding. Was made feasible for dairy cattle by the work of Prof. John Almquist, who, beginning in 1944 in the Borland Lab, perfected the use of antibiotics to preserve semen and developed commercial methods of using it. His internationally acclaimed research increased food production and breeding efficiency worldwide.

That’s all I have for right now. One or more parts will be coming throughout the week.

Posted under Football

Posting may be light this weekend, as the VB crew is on the road to see its team get killed in State College. Hopefully I’ll be able to get something up Saturday night, but I guarantee nothing, and I fully expect to have to hold FNL until monday.

Speaking of Friday Night Lights, by the time you read this, it is highly likely that we are in Youngstown to see Fitzgerald Toussaint, Isaiah Bell, and the rest of the Liberty Leopards as they face off against Warren Howland. Full report, of course, included when we get around to posting early next week.

We’ll be back as soon as possible, and in the meantime, Go Blue!

Editor’s note: This is an excerpt from a ridiculously long post I’ve been working on for OSU week. Since the PSU portion of the story is both very long and relevant to this week’s game, I’ve decided to post it as a standalone.

October 14, 2006 provided a roadtrip opportunity. We left for State College on Thursday night, so Danny could visit his girlfriend, a freshman at Penn State. By the time we got there, it was nearly midnight, so we dropped off Danny and his friend, then Paul and I explored the campus a bit, and paid way too much for one night in a hotel.

The next day, we were completely free from responsibility. We explored the town, bought Penn State gear (I’m an avid collector of any and all college merchandise), went for a ride on the Nittany Lion (a phrase which here means “sat on a stationary statue”), and generally took in the Penn State experience. It is at this time that I should probably recommend against going to an away game 40+ hours before it starts unless you have something or someone to see there, or are 21.

That night, Paternoville was certainly an experience itself, and the atmosphere among the student body was awesome. Of course, a friendly PSU fan offered me a paper plate to tape over the Michigan decal on the back of my car, to avoid getting all my windows broken. After failing to find a random couch to stay on (are there even house parties at Penn State?), we found a parking lot that didn’t seem to be a towing threat, tilted the seats in my car back, and slept. When we woke up the next morning, we found my passenger seat permanently reclined. This was a bad omen.

Fortunately for us, Penn State’s media relations office had furnished us with a parking pass. Unfortunately for us, their instructions on reaching the parking lot were something short of “subpar.” After finally dealing with myriad parking lot attendants, we left the car in the Black Lot and trudged back to the dorms. Once there, we snagged something to eat in a food court (all the while managing to avoid being stabbed by Chris Baker) and camped out on a couple of couches in a common room. As I drifted in and out of consciousness, catching up on sleep from the previous night, the games that we watched are kind of hazy. I remember seeing Indiana shock Iowa, diminishing the importance of our tilt against the Hawkeyes the following week. Whatever, I guess it would be that much easier to focus on tonight’s game.

As we left the commons area, I stripped off my Penn State sweatshirt, under which I had been wearing a maize Michigan shirt all along (take that, punks!). After revealing to the unwitting Nittany Lions all around me that I had been nothing more than a mole from the beginning, I became the recipient of all sorts of “friendly trash talk,” a phrase which here means “death threats.” On the death march back to my car, one thing really struck me: the Penn State fans had no doubt that they would win this game. Perhaps it’s just a difference between the fan bases, but I think the general tailgating attitude in Ann Arbor is mortal fear (or this year, resignation), especially when facing a more-highly ranked team that didn’t get housed by Notre Dame (Zing!). If I could extract that excitement from their fan base without getting the “threatening asshole” factor, I would certainly love to inject it into Michigan fans. There was no sense of entitlement, just excitement leading to confidence.

After changing into Official Media Costumes and arriving at the empty stadium, I took some time to snap a few glamour shots of the Beav. Beaver may be one of the most minor league hockey-like venues in the conference (of course, it doesn’t hold a candle to Sparty’s eye lasers), but the facility itself is nothing short of impressive. I’m not one for electronic music, especially when said music is “Zombie Nation,” and the pump-up videos on the board were bordering on brutally cheesy, but there are certainly aspects of the game experience that are redeeming. The inside of the stadium (you know, the part that doesn’t look like an erector set) is certainly one of them.

The students started to filter in before the rest of the fans. This took place two hours before the game started. Every single one was wearing white. Are you taking notes Michigan students? Be more like that. Always. The white-out was in full force. Like I had been weeks earlier against Notre Dame, I was on the sidelines. This time, I knew I wasn’t alone. Mike, Adrian, and Alan were definitely there. Steve Breaston may have been the unsung hero of the game (as he was for much of the 2006 season). Though the defense played well, I managed to hear a spirited Ron English rip into them at halftime. They responded.

The details have faded with time, but I remember the sense of elation once more, as the visiting fan section celebrated following the win. Danny was equal parts confused and excited. After Notre Dame, I couldn’t stop smiling for a week. Again, I was ecstatic on the drive home. This time, it was too long, and I was too tired to smile the whole way.

Posted under Football

When I previewed Penn State in the summer, I knew the Nittany Lions would be good. Did I know they’d be this good? Maybe not, but I certainly thought they’d be undefeated at this point in the season. PSU has run roughshod over pretty much every challenger in their way, primarily on the strength of QB Daryll Clark. Michigan would have to pull off one of the biggest surprises of the year so far to even stay within 20 of the Nittany Lions tomorrow afternoon.

Offense
Daryll Clark, perhaps most memorable to Michigan fans for being the second QB knocked out of the game the last time the Wolverines traveled to Happy Valley, has emerged as one of the premier signal-callers in the conference, if not the nation. He is reminiscent of Michael Robinson in directing Penn State’s Spread HD offense: he might not be the most skilled passer in the world, but Robinson proved a few years ago that it isn’t necessary to run a successful offense. The two-headed monster of Evan Royster and Stefphon Green that PSU fans predicted coming into the year has been primarily the Evan Royster show, with Green as more of a backup and situational player. On the wings, Jordan Norwood, Deon Butler, and Derrick Williams return for their 500th year as starters for Penn State. Their distribution of catches is disturbingly even, ranging from 21 to 23. Derrick Williams, with the most catches, has the fewest yards, though part of that may be due to the fact that he’s manning the underappreciated Steve Breaston 2006 role for PSU. The offensive line is doing well itself, having ceded the 12th fewest sacks in Division I-A, and earning the 12th most rushing yards.

For this specific matchup, I would like to hope that Michigan can at least slow down the rushing attack. The Wolverines’ DL is among the best Penn State has seen so far this year, but with the way Juice Williams owned the Wolverines, I don’t think Clark should struggle to get his team moving the ball on the ground. In the secondary, Boubacar Cissoko got some valuable experience last week in place of Donovan Warren, and if Warren returns this week, the corners should be able to be in position to stop the spread. As always, it’s the duty of the safeties and linebackers to strike fear into the hearts of Michigan fans.

Defense
The losses up front have not harmed the Nittany Lions like it seemed like they would early in the year. Chris Baker, Devon Still, and a host of other players have been replaced admirably by Aaron Maybin, Josh Gaines, and others. The one disappointment on that front, however, has been Maurice Evans. After a stellar 2007, he has yet to produce for Penn State this season. PSU’s linebackers have been led by Navorro Bowman. In the secondary, Penn State is in the top 10 in pass efficiency defense, but significantly worse in overall pass defense – that indicates little more than the fact that teams have been forced to pass their way out of big holes against PSU.

Michigan’s offense, if it wants to succeed at all, needs to get on the scoreboard early in this game. Penn State’s defense has succeeded mostly in preventing teams from playing a balanced offensive scheme. Of course, Michigan is unlikely to be able to run against Penn State either way. Martavious Odoms’s return is important, because it gives Steven Threet more ability to pass down the field and open up the run game. The possibility of Terrance Robinson and Justin Feagin finally playing this week also triples Michigan’s number of viable options in the slot.

Predictions
Someone other than Sam McGuffie is Michigan’s leading rusher.
Daryll Clark has at least 2 passing touchdowns and one rushing touchdown.
Michigan keeps it a little closer than expected, but loses 38-17.

Posted under Football